Tag: humor
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Half In The Bag
He was already half in the bag when I tripped over him laying, spreaded out across the kitchen floor with a bottle of Brass Monkey wrapped in a brown paper bag sticking out his back pocket of his favorite faded blue jeans. (Come to think about it he only owned one pair). He was mumbling…
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Cockeyed Junior
His name was cockeyed Junior. He lived in Nebraska out in the woods on a farm where things didn’t grow. The animals were frighten by him, even the pigs. He had this absurd crazy off-centered and drunken look about himself. He chewed on a stick of straw all day and all night like a horse until…
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Secret Confessions Katt Leya Act I: Kattnip
This woman is Phine not fine but Ph to the Muthaphuckin phine. Secret Confessions Katt Leya Act I: Kattnip When I first saw her, I had this stupid look on my face. I couldn’t even look at her because she was that fine. I mean dipped in honey phine. Can’t speak cause the words won’t…
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Fix Your Face
That stupid look on Your face after a False praise Right when you Drop everybody For somebody Ending up With nobody Harlem, Heaven is at the foot of Mother… https://dailypost.wordpress.com/prompts/praise/ #dailyprompt #praise
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Under The Influence
It’s that sobering moment of blurred vision once the road seemed to get narrower while approaching a checkpoint. That’s normally when you discover the art of effective driving verses irresponsible driving while under the influence of alcohol applies. The glare from the flashing headlights and the piercing sound of a police car siren that forces…
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Stinky’s Revenge
So you want to be a man. Say hello to my little friend. Welcome to the boys club. Now, let the games begin Stinky’s Revenge Stinky’s not True to this He’s green And new to it His frail body Wasn’t ready For Jail He must’ve weigh 100 pounds wet Holding a pail A brand New…
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Designated Driver
When mass transit can drive you safely to your destination better than your own personal designated driver. Designated Driver Speed bumps in the Sky as we Park letting the Cars drive by Taking the train To the game Avoiding traffic Often at night Can get heavy and thick – Designated Driver Drive by your Favorite drive-thru To…
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Masking the Layers
When the covers come off and the reality is revealed. Masking the Layers Foundation masking Nobody asking A pound of flesh – A snip here A tuck there The visual lie Her hidden agenda – Covering the wounds Never changing the sheets Masking the layers Another way to cheat – When she took off her…
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An Island Storm of Short Cuts
When an Island storm of short cuts bring about short cut results. An Island Storm of Short Cuts Beware of the person who’s in your life watching their biological clock, want children and to be married. This person may truly not want you but desire the idea of being married with children and you will…
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Gluttonous Maximus: Who Ate My Chili?
“Excuse me Sir. Please drop the candy bar and slowly back away from the small child”. Gluttonous Maximus: Who Ate My Chili? So you’re gonna let me vent right? Check this out. I can’t mention his name but maybe by chance you’ll figure it out but for now we’ll just call him “Tiny”. To tell…
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Pissed
This is fo the bitch azz muthaphucka that had the audacity to call the next nicca askin questions about a Brutha and their girl. Questions like. What you be callin fo? Why you be textin her, though? What’s goin on wit you and my girl? Listen up lil bitch, I’m only gonna say it once. Anytime you…
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The Boom-Boom Effect
His picture captured her attention but it was his words that obtained her arousal. Lady stood in the background deep within the shadows of the room finally mustering enough courage to let him know that the boom-boom effect exists. The Boom-Boom Effect On the 1st night she greeted him at the door wearing a wife…
Harlem Inner City Blues: Random Thoughts 